the one to finish up my writing class

I'm shocked at how fast this semester went by. I think it may be because I enjoyed all of my classes this semester. For what may have been the first time, I haven't been counting down the days to when classes end. There is usually one class that makes me so excited to be done with the semester. Luckily, it hasn't been like that for me. I've enjoyed my writing class this year. I've learned a lot. Probably my favorite thing it taught me was that my writing matters. It may not matter to many, but when I write it changes me, therefore, it's a big deal to me. I may not be able to express what I really think or how I really feel about some topics but the process of trying to put it into words has transformed me. I have become a different person because of each post or each writing assignment I have created. It becomes a part of me. That is so liberating to me! I may never be a phenomenal writer and that's ok. I write for myself and I'm thankful that I have the opportunity to do so.

the one for the person sitting next to me

So you don't know me. I doubt you'll see me again actually. Unless you become one of those few people I always see on campus, but never talk to, then never know if I should just introduce myself or not because we always run into each other! Anyway this is for you! Don't you feel special? Ha! You'll never know that I wrote a whole post for you. Just so I feel better about myself, let me explain why I'm doing some of the things I'm doing. You'll still probably judge me, because let's face it, you'll never read this. Ok so you're probably wondering why I'm always sitting here chuckling to myself. Well it's usually one of three things. 1. I probably got a text from a friend and it's probably about how my phone is dying and they noticed it on the creepy spin off of Find My Friends app. Or I found a funny meme on Pinterest, perhaps about grumpy cat or just a good pun. I do enjoy a good pun. Or last it might be something on Facebook that I find absolutely ridiculous enough to giggle at, like an Ellen Degeneres or Jimmy Fallon video. So I apologize if my hearty laugh is distracting in any way, but laughing is my favorite past time and it doesn't happen on campus as much so what I'm trying to say is I'm really not that sorry. So noticing that, you've probably also noticed my headphones start in my phone then proceed to move to my computer and back and forth, I don't even know how many times. Hopefully this isn't super annoying to you, I mean I really don't know why it would be, it's such a little thing. With that, I'm not even going to explain myself. Wondering why I get up so much? I have to fill up my water bottle a hundred times in one day, it's insane I know and annoying to me too! Which also means I'll need a bathroom break. Plus I get hungry. So that's probably the wrappers you're hearing as well. It's a Nutty Bar. It's always going to be a Nutty Bar. Literally every time. It's the only snack I get. They are delicious. And I will scarf it down in no time at all. You may notice I leave everything at my study space when I take my breaks. It's because I secretly trust you and it's the unspoken "please puppy-guard my belongings" routine. I mean that's basically friend status for you, random peer. Oh you noticed my homework? Nice. I probably haven't started it to be honest. It's sitting there so I look more productive. I do give it a few glances maybe even a few minutes. Thank you, I too am proud of myself for that. I tend to work better under pressure, so don't worry I'll get it done . . . eventually. I promise I am a good student, although it may not appear so now. Please don't question when I unpack my sweater or jacket from my backpack. Sometimes I run late to class. Ok, most of the time, but I'm rarely late! It's because I'm a great speed walker. Proud? Should be. I'm not sure why though. So when I have to speed walk up that blasted hill I get so sweaty. Therefore I do not need my jacket/sweater . . . but some of these classrooms are freezing! I'm not sure what the purpose of that is, but lucky for me I'm prepared! Look who paid attention at Girls Camp! So I get all cozy and nice. Other times it just makes a nice pillow. Yes that's what I was doing earlier. Napping. Haven't seen that on campus before? . . . Really? Seriously, that's sad, get out more. Everyone does it. One time someone walked in on me sneaking in a nap in the library in one of the study rooms. I scared him so bad when he turned on the lights! Haha! I mean who really expects to see a body lying on the ground when proceeding to go study?? Poor fellow. He was a nice guy though, he even shut the light off and backed out and told me I could finish my nap before he entered. Haha nah, his burst of fear was enough to make me leave for good. Anyway so when you notice my makeshift pillow come out it's because my class got cancelled or I have a half an hour break (which you know, just isn't enough time to really start homework). So if you just kept it down a little that'd be nice, well actually you haven't made a sound for awhile. Hmm . . . well if anyone else gets loud just mention something maybe. Or be that person that Shhs people. It'd be greatly appreciated, plus we're kinda friends. I mean. I did leave my stuff with you like three times already and you didn't steal anything so that's cool of you. I don't usually just start talking to myself so that means I just got a phone call. 90% chance it's my sister so I'll be talking to her about nothing important for awhile. Don't make eye contact with me because I'm not talking to you, I'm trying to funnel my voice to the little white box speaker thing on the headphones. If there is a long pause and you're curious if I hung up . . . I doubt it. Believe me, you'll know. Otherwise it's just moments when we have nothing to talk about but some company is sometimes nice, I mean you didn't think I was this unsocial with everyone did you? I'm a very social person actually. Oh goodness there is so much you don't know! Well, it'll just have to stay that way because the time has come for me to leave. I know you're thinking it's about time and to that I only have to say, rude. I really thought we got close, although this conversation did seem pretty one-sided. Well knowing that I laughed pretty hard writing this you're again questioning what the heck could I possibly be doing. Ha! I bet blogging about you wasn't on the list of hypotheses! Anyway, it's been nice. Dear peer, I hope you accomplish much more without me by your side---until we meet again.

the one about transferring to BYU

I have never wanted wanted to go to BYU. I thought it was a great school and was happy it was around, but it never felt like it was the place for me. My senior year I didn't even fill out the application--I just wasn't interested. This was probably unusual for a young LDS girl not wanting to go to BYU to be surrounded by others like her. Being raised with the same 30 members in my little branch my whole life and never having many with my same standards and same beliefs, I was used to standing out. In fact, I almost enjoyed it, not that I got a lot of attention, but I was well-known. It was kind of nice to have an audience that watched me, that knew I was the Mormon girl. I loved being that example, although at times it was difficult to feel my every move was being analyzed, I enjoyed the questions, respect, and understanding of my peers. So many LDS youth go to BYU to finally be in the majority and that's great for them! It just wasn't me. I went to my dream school, The University of Nebraska Lincoln! I loved it at UNL. I loved my major, I loved my friends group, I loved my singles ward, and I loved the school. After two semesters of attending there I began meeting with my Bishop and realized I felt like I was missing something in my life. I didn't know what it was but finally after months of praying about it I knew it was my mission. While on the mission I had planned to go back and finish my undergrad at UNL. I had so many sisters and companions telling me that I should transfer to here or there and my response was always the same, "Nah, I love Lincoln and I'm just not that interested in those schools." For months this happened. One sister finally shot at me saying, "Sister, you have to at least pray about it. What if Heavenly Father's plan for you has changed." It took me by surprise but I considered the idea of it. When I had been out for about a year I began thinking more about goals or plans for when I returned. I prayed that when the time was right I would know what to do. No longer than a week had passed when I woke up in the middle of the night sat up in my bed and had an intense and urgent feeling, "You need to apply to BYU." It was a simple thought but a pressing feeling. With permission from my President I was able to work on my application the next preparation day. I noticed the application was due in a month. That gave me 4 p-days to work on it--I take that back, 3 one of those days was a holiday the office and library would be closed. I did everything in my power to finish and submit it on time. I had to contact UNL and send my transcripts and on the last p-day before it was due I had sent everything off hoping it would arrive on time. I didn't necessarily want to go still but I wanted to follow my prompting. After about a month I heard back and saw that I had been accepted. I wasn't sure what I should do at this point. I continued to pray and just felt at peace that I wouldn't have been given a prompting if I wasn't suppose to follow and act upon it. I registered for classes for the fall and began mentally preparing myself that I would no longer be a cornhusker, but a cougar (let's be honest, I'll always be a cornhusker at heart). At the return home of my mission I had so many willing to help. A companion from Utah helped find me housing and I had so many wonderful people seeing me off as a began another chapter of my life. The first few months here at BYU were different for sure. The atmosphere is totally different than UNL. At first I missed Nebraska so much. I missed the people and the relaxed and slow lifestyle. I felt everyone was so uptight here and in a hurry. I didn't know why I was here besides the fact that it was a part of Heavenly Father's plan. After the first few rough months I began to like it, a lot in fact! I feel so blessed to be here now. I'm grateful for the spiritual prompting I was given. I'm thankful for good religious people to teach me and be a part of my education. I love being able to talk about my faith in different settings and have conversations focused on our beliefs in class. I love saying prayers before football games, classes, lectures, and exams. I thankful for firesides and devotionals throughout the week to increase the spirit on campus and in our lives. I love BYU and will be forever grateful for the opportunity I have now to study on this campus with so many wonderful friends.

Class

I'm sitting in class. . .and it's boring.
It's pretty much blizzard-ing outside, so I think we shoulda got out early but apparently Mr U (our principal, yes two teachers and I gave him that nickname) doesn't think so...

So my awesomespice teacher, Ms. O, who watches us (3 students) for the first 3 hours of school (the 3 of us take college classes through a system called the codec, so the teacher is from a different school and we connect over a t.v. looking thing, she watches us and runs errands and that kinda stuff), she randomly was just like
"Hmm. . .this snow makes me want hot chocolate. Let's get some!"
So we devised a plan and ran throughout the school building finding mugs and heating water to go with the hot chocolate packs she found. And so. . .we drank hot chocolate in my college English class. I bet the other schools were jealous.

I'm super stoked for Christmas break! sitting around in my pajamas sipping hot chocolate with my sister and blogging sounds perfect to me!
Only 9 1/4 school days left and counting!